What am I really doing when I coach people?

Earlier in the year I wrote this article about coaching for money. It was one of my more popular articles, massively shared in coaching communities. And I enjoyed the attention. But I didn’t really believe what I wrote.

I mean, it was an okay expression of what I kind of think. Maybe it’s even a frame that served me for a while when I was starting out. But I wouldn’t be enjoying the life I enjoy now if I’d stuck to that.

People often ask me about my “marketing strategy” and how I “create clients”. But the truth is I haven’t played that way for a while.

When I get really clear and honest, I realise I draw people into my life as an act of will.

I summon people who’ll evoke what I’m unconsciously longing to express.

And it’s amazing.

You see, every one is you. They are the yous on the outside. You are the you on the inside.

Trying to change the yous on the outside is silly. Changing you on the inside is the only true work of your life.

Providing value to my clients is very important to me, of course, but I have to be honest: life has got so much simpler since I stopped thinking my work is all about serving other people. My work is about transforming me. That’s the core. That’s what I’m here for.

Nobody would behave like I do if they were trying to run a “proper” coaching business. But that’s okay because I don’t really think I’m a coach; I’m just playing a wonderful game.

The game is about transcending my individual ego by seeing life through other eyes. I think we all experience the same life (or life force), but we experience it differently by focusing unique patterns of attention on specific parts of the whole.

You are the ultimate reality. Who you think you are is a subjective experience of that reality.

The world has created a menagerie of metaphors to describe the process of embodying the source code of someone else’s experience. In NLP, it’s called modelling; in Voodoo, it’s called possession. But I think about it in a simple way: I can think like me and experience life as me or I can think like you and experience life as you. The more I experience life through different eyes, the more this Chris Morris perspective feels like one choice among many, and the more I appreciate the One that all human beings reflect. This is my devotion.

The (tremendous) benefit to my clients is that I’m also a bit of a clean freak. When I’ve seen life through your eyes, I can point to all the crappy thinking you’ve become habituated to and don’t even realise is your thinking. Most people think life is just crappy. But when we clean away the crap (thinking), your experience of life becomes so much purer. The feeling is peaceful. Which means your behaviour inevitably becomes more straightforward. Which means you can express your true will.

"Chris is like a Shakespearean fool for modern-day leaders"

“Chris is like a Shakespearean fool for modern-day leaders”

The fact I get great feedback and referrals is nice, but it’s essentially unimportant to me. If you told me I was amazing at sticking my tongue in the electric socket, I wouldn’t start doing it. I don’t do things because I’m good at them. I get good at things because I do them. And I do my true will.

This also helps me understand why I draw in “difficult clients”.

I love talking to people who’ve been toying with talking to me for a long time. I love people who try to outwit me and prove I’m wrong about my own experiences. I even love people who get violent.

Their reluctance is my reluctance; their fear is my fear. I know they want to be stripped bare, because that is what I want too. And I know it’s as thrilling as it is terrifying, which is why we’re drawn to each other with some trepidation. It’s also why we can only do this in union, falling in love together. Because beyond you and me is a space: and that space is who we both really are.

The rhythm of love is the beat of god’s heart; the pulse that pushes everything to everywhere.

Holy conversations aren’t supposed to be easy. I’ll never hold back from showing you what I see in you, and sometimes that will seem provocative and sometimes it will even feel unkind. If you want to be around me, you’ll have to face your demons. Because it’s only by facing those demons that we can banish them for good, and that’s what clarity is really about… banishing the thought-forms that clutter up your thinking environment; reclaiming sovereignty over the space you create your life from and in.

I realise this is another article I may disagree with in a few months (or even a few days!), but for now this is the best expression of Chris Morris I can be — and it’s only possible because you are reading these words. So thank you.

[fbls]
“Speaking with Chris Morris was the beginning of a fantastic trip, and it hasn’t ended yet. After our conversation this morning, I found myself gently nudged out of the reality I was so accustomed to knowing. It led to an entire day where I experienced a level of inner peace only previously possible through journeys with mind altering substances. The stillness I’m in now is incredible. It’s like a sense of floating through life. Instead of a heavy, arduous existence, I feel like I’m floating ever so gently on the breeze of the moment. Where there was resistance, now there is ease. Where there was struggle, now there is flow. Where there was anxiety, now there is peace. Thank you Chris.”Dave Booda
“Ever since I met Chris, I know what it feels like to be inspired. Being around him, it is hard not to grow. He has the heart to love unconditionally, the mind of a genius and the guts to look and point at things that others may be too afraid of (or simply not curious enough).”Felix Thissen